We had planned to be on the truck today, but there has been a change of plan; Or a change of heart. It is Christmas after all.
We have a Christmas breakfast by the truck of fried eggs, baked beans and cheese, which, as a reminder of home comforts is a real luxury to at least the Brits among us.
However, when I get woken up this morning by Laurie brightly wishing me a merry Christmas, all I can think to say is ‘Bah Humbug!’. ‘What does that mean?’, she says. Being French, she is not aware of the tale of Scrooge and the ghosts of Christmas past / present / future. I give her a brief synopsis of the story to which she replies ‘so what happens to the cow?’. ‘What cow?’, say I. ‘The Christmas Cow!’ says Laurie, ‘that’s the name of the story isn’t it?’.
I am not sure what to do today, as tubing is pretty seems there is to do in Vang Vieng, besides frequenting its many bars with constant reruns of Family Guy or The Simpsons showing on TV.
I thought the trip down the river yesterday was pleasant, but not terribly exciting. However, Essex and crew are going to go today, and I decide that if I am going to do a floating pub crawl, I really should do it with someone like Essex and not someone like Laurie, who is known to be immediately hungover after one glass of wine (so not French!).
Before starting the tubing, we go to lunch at a place called the Aussie Bar, which, unsurprisingly, is run by an Australian. He is married to a local woman and, though the menu is typically Australian, the cooking by locals is not. The owner claims to do the best burger in town, as well as the best pizza; in fact, probably the best everything. However, when little Essex’s burger arrives it is plentiful but burnt. My pizza, which arrives after a tourist season has passed, has a crust like stale bread. The sauce on the base is ketchup. Not only is this not the best pizza in Vang Vieng, I am sure, it is the worst one I have seen or tasted in the whole world! Marks out of ten? –ve 1,587,669. Bah bloody humbug!
On the river today, I get into the spirit(s) of things a lot more. In fact, Essex, Just John and chef Martin and Jen decline to take part in any of the fun and games. I think they are feeling a wee bit fragile themselves today. Only Hughie joins me on some of the swings, etc.
At the first bar, I get on the zip line and hold on till the hand support reaches the end of the line, propelling me off and flipping me multiple times into the river. Man that was fun....I have to go again.
At a later bar, there is a slide that doesn’t look all that exciting when looking at it from the bottom. The end of the slide is a hockey stick shape, but it doesn’t look like much of a thrill to look as I am not convinced the hook upwards is enough to project a grown adult very far. In fact I am worried that I would just fall over the edge and hit the shallow water near the bank. However, when I watch an overweight teenager slide down and fly into the river, I decide that I could well be wrong in my calculations and decide to give it a go, having filled myself with quite a bit of Dutch courage by now. I turn out to be very wrong, as the slide hurls me up and then almost half way across the river.
After this quick adrenaline hit, I chat to someone who says that the challenge is to do the slide twice. He has scratches on his torso from some uneven tiles on the slide. My Dutch courage says I have to face this challenge, and the slide down is more nerve racking knowing that I have to be as careful sliding as I do about hitting the water.
After the day’s adventures, I find that some people have booked a Christmas dinner at the Aussie Bar. I warn them off it and decide to give Vang Vieng another chance in the pizza challenge by going to a place we passed on the drive into Vang Vieng a couple of days ago. It’s average though. 5/10.
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